i must have done something right...

my smiling baby..
funny how a very tiny person, not more than one foot at that time, clearly showed me what i should do with my life, or what was left of it.. . nevermind the doubts and the anxiety felt upon confirming that indeed, i would be a mother at last... of course i realized early on--from experience-- that my immunity from problem wasn't that great and of course i was scared of bringing another person, with far less immunity than i to a lot of things or-- so i thought-- into a very complex world that even i, a grown up, have trouble understanding. sure i prepped myself up by reading pregnancy books, parents' magazines, family-oriented how-to's and talking to "stable" parents-- the works-- but nothing prepared me for the bliss of seeing a tiny human being coming out of my own body, all slimy and wrinkled, innocent, crying for dear life.. needing me.. depending on me, telling me in not so many 'grown-up words' what i should do with the two greatest gifts that i have.. my life and that tiny person who i was afraid to even touch for the fear of hurting "it"... beautiful.... simply beautiful... that very mminute, i thought that in all that i've been through.. all these years....i must have done something right...